It was heavy, it was all so heavy.
I called him crying, I couldn't gather my words...He knew.
I wasn't in a place where I was rational enough to make this choice. I had to slow down. My thoughts were all over the place.
How did I get here?
I just graduated from college.
Will I be my parents?
This is going to be ok, right?
OMG, I am pregnant!!
What in the hell?
I have no money.
Let's start from the beginning...
Figuring out who I was going to become had just started because I had just graduated with a food science degree from NCSU in May 2012. I finally made it, boy was I relieved to be done with that hurdle in my life and looking forward to starting the next journey. It had been 5 months since I graduated with no job offers, so I was working at the dairy on campus until something came through. I was losing hope. I was stressed because I had to pay bills and eat, well it didn't get any better once I missed my cycle. My cycle was a few days late, but no worries because this has to be stress. Stress definitely made sense because I had to borrow money from my grandmother to pay 3 months of missed rent because I was using the money from the dairy to pay half of the utilities.
A week passed and my cycle hadn't arrived, so I put my big girl panties on and purchased a pregnancy test. It was positive. I immediately started to cry. The conversation that proceeded with the guy who I got pregnant by was much needed. I was reminded that this shouldn't be an emotional decision. He presented all of the reasons why this currently would not work out in favor of the child and asked all of the right questions. I needed to deal with facts and the fact was we were not in the position to be parents.
Two weeks later I aborted the pregnancy. It was the best choice that I could have ever made and I am very thankful that I had that option. In the midst of this political climate, I was able to find MRAY, a beautiful company started by women who stand with women. They started My Body My Rules, so they could contribute to protecting women's rights and the freedom for us to choose. Please take a look at the merchandise and purchase if you can because 25% of all proceeds will go to an organization that supports our right to choose.
This is a heavy choice, but nonetheless it should always be your choice.